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It's time to kick ass and chew bubblegum...

and I'm all out of gum.

21 September
External Services:
  • joshthejuggla@livejournal.com
These are my feelings and thoughts on such. Since for the most part only friends can see it, random people need to ask.

I think this fits pretty well though.

I’m a modern man, a man for the millennium. Digital and smoke-free. Diversified, multicultural, post-modern deconstructionist. Politically, anatomically, and ecologically incorrect. I’ve been up linked and downloaded, I’ve been inputted and outsourced, I know the upside of downsizing, I know the downside of upgrading. I’m a high-tech low-life. A cutting edge state of the art, bi-coastal, multi tasker, and I can give you a gigabyte, in a nanosecond. I’m new wave but I’m old school and my inner child is outward bound. I’m a hot-wired heat seeking warm-hearted cool customer. Voice activated and biodegradable. I interface with my database and my database is in cyberspace. So I’m interactive, hyperactive and, from time to time, I’m radioactive. Behind the eight ball, ahead of the curve, riding the wave, dodging a bullet, pushing the envelope. I’m on point, on task, on message and off drugs. I got no need for coke and speed, I got no urge to binge and purge. I’m in the moment, on the edge, over the top but under the radar. A high concept low profile medium-raged ballistic missionary. A street-wise smart bomb. A top gun bottom feeder. I wear power ties, I tell power lies, I take power naps, I run victory laps. I’m a totally on going Bigfoot slam-dunk rainmaker with a pro-active outreach. A raging workaholic. A working rage-aholic. Out of rehab and in denial. I got a personal trainer, a personal shopper, a personal assistant and a personal agenda. You can’t shut me up, you can’t dumb me down. Because I’m tireless and I’m wireless. I’m an alpha male on beta-blockers. I’m a nonbeliever and an over achiever. Laid back but fashion forward. Up front, down home, low rent, high maintenance. Super sized, long lasting, high definition, fast acting, oven-ready and built to last. I’m a hands on footloose knee-jerk head case. Prematurely posttraumatic and I have a love child who sends me hate mail. But I’m feeling, I’m caring, I’m healing, I’m sharing. A supportive, bonding, nurturing primary caregiver. My output is down but my income is up. I take a short position on the long bond and my revenue stream has it’s own cash flow. I read junk mail, I eat junk food, I buy junk bonds, I watch trash sports. I’m gender specific, capital intensive, user friendly, and lactose intolerant. I like rough sex, I like tough love. I use the f-word in my e-mail and the software on my hard drive is hardcore, no soft porn. I bought a microwave at a mini-mall; I bought a minivan in a mega store. I eat fast food in the slow lane. I’m toll free, bite size, and ready to wear and I come in all sizes. A fully equipped, factory authorized, hospital tested, clinically proven, scientifically formulated medical miracle. I’ve been pre-washed, precooked, preheated, prescreened, pre approved, prepackaged, post-dated, freeze-dried, double wrapped, vacuum packed and I have an unlimited broadband capacity. I’m a rude dude but I’m the real deal, lean and mean, cocked, locked, and ready to rock. Rough, tough and hard to bluff. I take it slow, I go with the flow. I ride with the tide, I got glide in my stride. Driving and moving, sailing and spinning, jiving and grooving, wailing and winning. I don’t snooze, so I don’t lose. I keep the pedal to the metal, and the rubber on the road. I party hardy, and lunch time is crunch time. I’m hanging in, there ain’t no doubt, and I’m hanging tough, over and out.